venting

I'm tired of people telling me that I'm making my kids scared of foods or scared to do anything. Or that I'm overreacting...I try so hard to stay calm when we are around the foods they are allergic to. I try to teach them that it's better to be safe than sorry instead of being scared. We have been to restaurants that serve nuts, we have been to the circus, we fly southwest, etc....we are just careful...always AWARE - they say she's in 2nd grade let her go - make her do stuff - go to the overnights and camps...but if she doesn't want to - I haven't made her yet. They take it personally when my daughter or son ask to read the labels or to double check something new. I praise my kids for it and for being careful. I want it to become a habit to ask. People need to stop taking it personally and I wish I wasn't so sensitive to their judgement. It's been a long 6 years of advocating for my kids - asking for a nut free preschool and losing friends...today one of my closest friends said some hurtful stuff. I just had to vent. Sometimes I feel like I'm alone in this. I don't want to take risks if we aren't certain when it comes to their safety and health.  But I don't want to give them anxiety either. It's so hard to find a happy medium. To not hover, but to be there...to be cautious, but not scared...